The humor in it?

This morning I was really angry.  I woke up happy ready for a day with my family but quickly realized once out of the house that I was angry about my hair falling out.  I was angry that I feel conspicuous wearing a wig, or not wearing a wig.  Standing in line at the bagel store picking up a little snack I was behind a young woman.  She was somewhere between 16 and 20 (geez it's sad that I can't even tell that range apart any more!) and she was complaining to her boyfriend (I assume) how her eyebrow was crooked and she was sure everyone was staring at her.  I just kept thinking what a little twit this girl was and I should just take my wig off to show her what something real looks like instead of worrying about an eyebrow.  It kept getting worse as this girl was so clearly living in her own self-absorbed world and was actually holding up the line to transfer money online because she had apparently brought the wrong debit card with her- and "it would just take a minute" to transfer the funds online via her phone.  As I stood there becoming increasingly agitated I realized that I was just angry.  It had nothing to do with this girl and everything to do with how I was coping with my situation in that moment.

Just as I was accepting that I was just going to be angry and that was okay too, the woman standing behind me tapped me on the shoulder.  "You have such beautiful hair- how do you get it so shiny?"  I almost started laughing on the spot.  I thanked her and told her it was a wig.  She didn't seemed shocked but still impressed at how pretty my very shiny hair was.  In that moment I realized that the universe, god, whatever you want to call it, is on my side.  It is completely okay for me to be angry, but the fact of the matter is that I am not all that different than the girl who was sure everyone was staring at her crooked eyebrow.  And even if someone is aware that I'm wearing a wig, or bald or whatever it is that day, someone else may very well be noticing beauty in the exact thing I am certain makes me ugly or funny looking.

That was my gift today.  I sit here, stripped down both physically and metaphorically.  Every day my layers are stripped down revealing my naked, vulnerable self and I am being forced to look in the mirror at the image reflected.  Honestly, I don't much like what I see because I am realizing how masked I have been all this time.  As my mom reminded me today, it is time for me to start seeing myself the way others see me.  So instead of staring at my "crooked eyebrow" I am looking for my shiny hair.  May sound silly, but it was a huge gift for me today.  I had a wonderful day as a result, with no residual anger, truly happy as I basked in the love of my husband and daughter.

All of this was topped off by a fabulous dinner at our dear friends Russell & Colleen.  Shout out to Colleen for putting together a wonderful meal- great job!  The chicken parm was delicious!  The company couldn't be beat- so many laughs- I am lucky to have such fabulous friends!  Also thank you to Laura for my fabulous moisturizer.  You are so incredibly thoughtful and it is a gift to have you in my life.  And Anya- thank you for my stone.  I can't wait to read about its properties!