Oh Geez...

I pulled my computer into bed with me tonight since I was on my own with the two kiddos and don't you know, I just realized that I posted the same silly picture of my littles twice!  Goodness.  If that doesn't tell you where my brain is at, I don't know what will!

We've been busy, and it doesn't look like we will be slowing down any time soon.  I have signed Bella up for preschool (pretty sure I already told you that).  She will start in one week!!!  We met her teachers this week, and they seem great.  Kind and present.  Exactly what I was hoping for.  We will see how it goes when it is time for me to leave her there alone.  The good news is that they are supportive of gentle transitions and if she needs me to stay in the room, I will do just that.  Until she is ready for me to walk out the door, I have no intention of doing so.

Before that though, we are going to take a little family trip down to Disneyland.  I'm really hoping it is a good week.  Time to reconnect as a family, special moments for all four of us.  Gio is so involved in the world now I know he is going to go nuts with some of the rides and characters.  Bella loves all things Disney of course and has recently been able to actually ride the roller coasters and other crazy rides, so is excited to do some more. I am also hoping to rekindle some love between Nick and I since it is of course the place he proposed.  We all just need a little more loves these days.

These past few weeks have kept us busy too.  We had solar panels installed (at the same time the city was resurfacing our street!), which also included a new electric panel for our house.  We are down to the final step which is PG&E putting in a new meter that will interconnect our system with theirs.  Then- we go live!  Very excited to see how our system does.

We also enjoyed a visit from our wedding photographer, Ron Miller, who indulged us with a family photo shoot!  I promise to share some of the (surely amazing) results once I see them.  He's a busy busy man with loads of weddings and a family of his own, so I am waiting (not so) patiently. =)

On top of all of this, our house was wiped out by the plague.  I was personally sick for a solid week, couldn't even get out of bed for three straight days!  The kids have followed with their own version.  I ended up having to take my sweet boy to the pediatrician because I was so worried about this horrible cough he has.  Turned out the congestion wasn't in his lungs, but he did have a really terrible ear infection.  So the poor guy has been on antibiotics for over a week now!  Nearly done.  They both sadly still have this cough.  I'm at my wits end- I just have no idea what to do for my poor kiddos. The vicks and homeopathic cough syrup (plus benedryl for Bella) is just not cutting it.

So there you have it.  Our crazy, messy life.  La Bella Vita!

Growing Up!

It's official, my big girl starts preschool this fall.  I mailed the check and committed us to a local school two days a week.  She will only go for "normal" preschool hours- in other words, mornings.  I will pick her up at noon for lunch (and hopefully nap!).  If she loves it, and we love it, and all is well, we may increase to three days a week later in the school year.  For now it will be just a few hours a week that I can spend one on one with Gio, and Bella gets to do art and music and play with new friends we haven't met yet (her words).  She will also continue with her gymnastics class, though has aged up to an independent class (no parent participation anymore).  Once we are in the swing of school, I might look to add a dance or music class to the regimen too.  Gio will also get to start gymnastics after his birthday.  I can't believe how big my kiddos are getting.  They amaze me (and exhaust and challenge me) every single day.  I am so lucky to be their mama.

Two Years

Two years ago today I walked into our local hospital an "intact"
woman. Intact, but diseased. I spent hours in surgery to remove a part
of my body and was declared cancer free.

Two years ago today, I became cancer free.

This is the date my doctors wanted to see me to. Well- a lifetime of
course, but first, today.

I want to be joyous and celebratory. The fact is, I'm still scared. I
haven't had a scan since the end of chemo. We believe I am still
cancer free, but can't actually say for certain. I know that until I
am able to have that scan, I will hear that quiet whisper in the back
of my head that says "what if" and "maybe" and "you don't really
know"...

But today, I will say "I made it". And leave it at that.

Catch up

Well well well, it has again been quite awhile since I posted here.  Two kids just doesn't leave a lot of time for thoughtful posts and as a result I just don't post!  I have been a bit busy actually doing things too! So here's my catch up!

Gio is nearly ten months old.  Time flies.  He is such a character.  He is funny and focused and such a boy!  He is rough and tumble and in to EVERYTHING.  He has three teeth so far, two bottom and one on top.  I think he keeps biting is tongue too!  Poor guy.  To add to the pain in his mouth.  But he is such a love.  He looks at me (and frankly most women) with these deep bedroom eyes that make you want to just pick him up and snuggle him.  And then he'll grin with that one dimple.  Oh my goodness this child.  The girls are going to swoon.

Bella is three!  She continues to shine and be her amazing self.  She is hilarious and strong and so fashionable.  I finally had to institute a dress day/ drawer day rule because she would wear dresses every single day, and mostly I was sick of seeing the same things knowing there was an amazing collection of clothing going unused in her drawers.  She's doing pretty well with it (clear, structured rules) and puts together these adorable outfits on every drawer day.  I love (and loathe) her opinions. =)

Most recently I've been keeping busy with a few things.  The first was planning a big birthday bash for miss Bella!  (Read about it here Purple Princess Party).  Also, we are going solar!  We have contracted with a company to put photo-voltaic solar panels on our home to help control our crazy electric bill.  I'm excited both from a financial and (more importantly) environmental perspective.  I still have some other things to do (we have decided to sell the corvette, I know... and Bella will start preschool this fall!) but we've done quite a bit this summer!

In other news, I gave an interview today to a woman writing for the Huffington post.  She's doing a series on breastfeeding (from all angles, good, bad and ugly) and I will be one of the women profiled!  Once it comes out I'll share it.  It was a good reminder to me that I have an interesting story that is worth sharing.  I was told once upon a time that I should write a book.  I keep thinking about that, but then ask myself why someone would want to read it.  What is the point of my story?  Hope? Strength?  I really don't know.  I'm afraid I won't be able to write it until I can answer that.  But then think I probably will never have that answer and should just start writing.  Perhaps it would reveal itself in the process.  So I ask you- if you read this blog regularly, would you read my story in book form?  Why?  What do you find interesting here?  Maybe it will help light a fire under me... =)

So there you go.  That's my update for now!  Here's a picture of my two crazy littles.  I sure do love them!