Onward and Upward

Well here we are.  I'm not sure why it has taken me so long to finally write this post, but I wasn't fully ready until now.


After several years of struggle, my marriage has ended.  I am not going to detail what happened here as I feel that it isn't appropriate blog fodder.  That is why I essentially stopped writing over the last two years.  I blamed it on being busy and having a baby and any other number of things, but the truth is simply that the biggest issue in my life was my marriage and I didn't feel like I could talk about it.  Suffice it to say that I fought hard for my marriage.  I have learned an incredible amount about what marriage takes and I look forward to finding my happily ever after someday where I can apply what I've learned.


This isn't new, so no notes of condolence are needed.  I just needed to take my time to let the dust settle a bit before I shared.  Hopefully now I can find my way to posting again with the candid honesty I've enjoyed in the past.  And also, my mom moved up to Oregon after Thanksgiving, so I am truly on my own with the kids.


With that said, I am working very hard to move on.  I am working on reclaiming my home.  Figuring out what a house that is all mine looks and feels like.  I have begun dating a bit- something I've never done as an adult.  At this point it is fun and entertaining.  I am admittedly lonely and finding managing a household with two children and two dogs, alone, to be a HUGE challenge.  But I have faith in my own strength to persevere and find my way.  And I'm guessing about the time I get a handle on how to do it alone, I will find a new partner to share my life with.


So truly, onward and upward.  I own my warrior status and carry my strength into life.  I'm hoping to lose that mantle soon though.  I'm ready to set my sword down and be done fighting.  I seek balance and peace and love.  And I trust fully that I will find it.


In the words of Maya Angelou,


Still I rise....